STOLEN FROM: Philadelphia Will Do » Live 8 Drinking Game
Live 8 Drinking Game

Ahh, Live 8. By now you’ve all heard that every American music artist from Puff Daddy to Sean Combs to P. Diddy is playing the United States edition of the awareness concert on July 2. I’m not really a big fan of any of the bands except for African Debt Relief — they rock.

That doesn’t mean I’m not excited about Live 8. As with anything in Philadelphia in a huge crowd, I expect it to be an unmitigated disaster. Come on: it’s Philadelphia. We couldn’t even film a season of The Real World here without several blowups. The million or so people who descend on the Ben Franklin Parkway on Saturday will undoubtedly ruin something for someone, and I say, “Great!” (Unless somebody breaks my arm or something.)

To make this event even more enjoyable, I’ve come up with a drinking game based on Live 8. I’d suggest if you actually go to the concert to
do this with water — or, in my case, not do it at all — since it’s going to be a very long concert and it’s best if no one got hurt.

Without further adieu, here is the Live 8 Drinking Game (Philadelphia Edition):

Take a sip if…
… Philadelphia Mayor John Street says something stupid.
… Jay-Z has more than 10 people on stage with him.
… you see someone selling water for more than $4.
… somebody yells “Fuck Bush!”
… a kid in a Dave Matthews Band shirt does something annoying.
… you see Heather Locklear.
… a band gets booed.
… a statue on the Parkway gets damaged.
… you hear someone complaining.
… somebody strikes up an “E-A-G-L-E-S, EAGLES!” chant.

Take a bigger sip if…
… something gets lit on fire.
… somebody yells “Fuck the police!”
… Jay-Z does a duet with Beyonce.
… somebody calls that one band playing the “Kaiser Chefs.”
… you see someone selling bootleg Live 8 merchandise.
… Will Smith says “Aw hell naw!”
… someone hands you a white “ONE’ wristband.
… somebody makes the “What has nine arms and sucks?” joke about Def Leppard.
… Bono comes on one of the TV screens and rambles for a few minutes.
… you see someone you think is a celebrity, but turns out not to be one.

Take a gulp if…
… John Street gets lit on fire.
… somebody yells “Free Mumia!”
… Jay-Z does a duet with Linkin Park.
… Maroon 5 mentions Pennsbury High School.
… a statue on the Parkway is destroyed.
… you smell weed.
… someone asks why they’re having this concert.
… P. Diddy has more than 20 people on stage with him.
… you see an actual celebrity other than the performers.
… Phil Collins shows up.

Finish your drink if…
… Stevie Wonder regains his vision.
… Jay-Z does a duet with Linkin Park and Beyonce.
… Michael Jackson shows up.
… The Pope shows up.
… the former members of Destiny’s Child return.
… Bruce Springsteen and Bob Dylan appear.
… people sing “We Are The World.”
… people sing “I’d Like To Buy The World A Coke.”
… Toby Keith burns the American flag.
… you figure out who Keith Urban is.

Finish all your drinks (and buy more) if…
… Michael Jackson invites children on stage with him.
… everyone takes their trash when they leave.
… the Phillies win their July 2 game.
… Rob Thomas doesn’t suck.
… everything goes off without a hitch.

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This entry was posted on Friday, July 1st, 2005 at 1:44 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.